Monday, May 18, 2009

Monday: Pants Optional

With higher temperatures upon us in Sacto I have officially dubbed Mondays as Pant Optional. In fact, I think that I will extend this dress-code relaxing to all days for the rest of the Hell Scape people call summer here.  
Roll Call:
1.  In observation of the day I have spent much of it sans pants working from the couch and attempting to write reports for work.  

2.  Why does my face feel it necessary to relive high-school era blemishtopia?  I woke up this morning (covered in a thin film of sweat even with the AC kicking in off and on) only to rub my face and marvel at all the small volcanoes that arrived suddenly.  Ugh.  Body, seriously, knock it off. 

3.  Enough with hating on my skin.  That ain't no way to live.  Where my feminists at?  I am ready a fairly entertaining historical fiction book entitled The Company:

with which I have one major issue with.  It is very much an ensemble cast, but so far all but one of the female characters have "failed" in some manner.  Not passed a test that all the men did, is shallow and vain to a degree of losing love, life goals, etc.  I also recently have heard too many sexist comments about female drivers, unsightly hair, the dangers of a woman PMSing.  WHAT THE HELL PEOPLE!  In order to recover from this onslaught of lady-bashing I have been refreshing my Jezebel page religiously.  Thank goodness Judge Judy is here to mediate the shit out of things.  

4.  In a strangely fitting musical experience: I have had Tina Turner's "Private Dancer" running on loop in my head for nearly two weeks straight.  Nothing like taking a shower and realizing all that I am actually thinking and doing is attempting to faithfully recreate the sensual "oohs" and "ahhs" Tina does halfway through the song while lathering and rinsing.  

5.  Wants to suggest to Tony Bourdain and his lovely wife that we all get it on french style sexitimes.  That man is dreamy.  In my pants.  Which I am not wearing.  Perhaps I will put on pants tomorrow so that I can take them off again when the Bourdain's accept my menage-a-trois offer.  

He's thinking about it...
And we're a go!

1 comment:

Brittany said...

No pants AND Anthony Tony Bourdain?

Ahhh....best post ever.